According to Lee Varon's book on single parent adoption, the "home study is often referred to as parent preparation." Heck, we all know this is really secondary to its true purpose- an evaluation of ME as a prospective parent. It is one of the near final steps of a process that culminates into a document, my profile. This comprehensive profile, assembled by the agency with careful thought and thoroughness, will serve as the basis for a decision by a birthmother as to whether or not I am a good "fit" to adopt her baby. The process includes a series of meetings, review of "my life" autobiography sewn together in 6 typed pages (10 pt typeface!), and five referral letters written by friends. The home study generally falls 3-6 months into the process, and is the near final step before the agency adds my profile to the que of "readily awaiting" prospective parents.
And so tomorrow, my assigned counselor from the agency, K., will visit me in my home to spend approx. four hours to discuss a range of topics from my experiences with children to my values and plans to parent a child to my acceptance of differences to my health and financial situation to my current living arrangement and support network, to my views on open adoption and how I will discuss with my child my decision to adopt as a single parent. Whew! Perhaps this explains my insomnia the past few nights! =) Any ONE of these topics alone could fill a four hour conversation with a good friend or with my counselor K! E.g., what we believe about discipline and children, the complex question and reasons underlying a single woman's decision to adopt, and the support system and security we will strive to give our children. Easily four hours/topic!
So, I am a little nervous but I can only be my true self- it is the person I know the best and who will speak from the heart. Off to a good night's sleep.
ps> Is my place immaculate and in complete order? No, it is clean, of course, but has its share of piles (papers, books, photos) as it would not be me otherwise. My friends know this about me all too well! ; )
1 comment:
Sweet leslie,
I so understand your insomnia. I would feel the same. But you have nothing to fear. You have a mother in your heart that is just waiting to come out. Its evident to everybody who knows you. So yes - just be true to your wonderful self and let K see the leslie we all love so much. Sending you lots of hugs and thoughts from the first snowy day in Copenhagen.
knus and lots of them
trine
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